Support in tough times

Shit.
Fuck.
Damn.
I didn't see it coming.

I walked into the funeral home to give love to a beautiful soul who would become a dear friend. She'd lost her sweet baby boy to SIDS and I was at the visitation with another momma; our oldest sons were in pre-school together (I swore I would never be friends with THOSE moms. Lol).

I searched for my friend and thoughts raced through my head: what do I say to a mother who was, in all transparency, living every parents worst nightmare; my worst nightmare? I don't want to say the wrong thing. How do I support her?
When I finally got to her I felt the tears swell in my eyes; I could feel her broken heart. As I wrapped my arms around her and held her tight I whispered in her ear: Shit. Fuck. Damn. Because SHIT. FUUUUUUCK. DAMN. Since then, it's been our code for "I need my friends" or "I'm going through some stuff please send love". We have all stayed friends; supporting each other, protecting each other, holding space for healing and giving each other grace as we navigate being moms and women in the world.

My dear friend @lesliedempe83 who was the recipient of those words that night didn't know it; she created a new herd of elephants around her. Female elephants protect each other. When a female elephant gives birth, the other females make a circle around her and kick up dust so predators don't smell the blood or prey on the laboring mother. When a calf dies, elephants grieve and the other females again circle around the dead calf while the mother grieves and if a mother dies, the females in the herd will adopt the calves and raise them. They take care of their women.
Lastnight she gave us the mug I am holding in this picture. When she told me she found it at the mall I was surprised because what are the chances?! 100%

🐘🐘Who are your elephants? 🐘🐘